One Last Push!
With Finals week in most medical schools in progress, I have witnessed the stress that medical students have to endure. Well of course, medical school was never easy and I always believe in the saying that anything worth having never really comes easy.
Given this let me tell you a story about a medical student named Pete. Pete has always been competent in whatever he did. In high school, he was a student leader, a taekwondo black belt who represented his school in competitions, an athlete who excelled in most sports and the second top student of his class. He was groomed by his parents to study hard and be the best he could be.
To follow in the footsteps of his doctor father, Pete took up Premed at a good university and still showed excellence despite some mishaps and shortcomings. However, it was in medical school when Pete met the greatest challenges of his life. Pete entered medical school A and almost failed every single subject in first year.
Getting a pre-final grade of 50% in Anatomy seemed to be a nail in the coffin of his medical studies but somehow Pete managed to give it one great push and passed it. In second year, just when Pete seemed to be on a roll, a personal tragedy hindered him and sent him into depression which resulted in a suicide attempt. Pete survived but his spirit was shattered.
Gone was the shiny beacon of excellence. There in the hospital bed lay a broken person who did not know his direction. Pete suddenly lost his drive and it seemed that it was over. His parents decided he should take a rest and so he did.
A year later, Pete decided it was time to give it another go. However, he transferred to Medical School B with hopes that this would be the place where he would make it. At first all went well but Pete did make friends with unsavory people (who were not medical students). Spending many nights partying with these new friends and always getting drunk or stoned (yes Pete went into using illicit drugs), Pete went on to fail Pathology twice which resulted in him getting dismissed from that medical school.
As Pete's parents investigated what went wrong, the Dean of that school told them that "with your son's attitude, he will NEVER become a doctor!" Rejected, Pete went on to do other things but something inside him always knew there was something unfinished in his life.
After a hiatus of a few years, Pete went back in and his time at Medical School C. His initial year was good and he garnered good grades. However, in Third Year, Pete came down with a sleeping disorder (probably a consequence of his drug use) which sent him into great depression and his grades spiraling down to the depths of abyss. He failed two subjects but was not dismissed.
The Dean of that school was even optimistic that these failures were just setbacks but he saw potential in Pete and said "I am sure he will become a good doctor someday".
Pete decided that it might be more conducive for him to move to another school, hence Medical School D.
At Medical School D, Pete seemed to do better than he did before. He went on to become a student leader and gained the trust and respect of both his teachers and peers. Pete did have one other quirk which was made evident during his clerkship year, he was very stubborn.
His stubbornness became the one thing that resident doctors hated about him. As he rotated from department to department, resident doctors endorsed him as being stubborn and lazy. Rightfully so as Pete had this attitude that if he did not want to go on duty, he would not show up at all. This attitude of his even annoyed his group mates who had to bear the burden of the extra work he left behind.
This was the reason that Pete was not allowed to attend his own graduation. Nevertheless, after he left Medical School D, these waves he created tided over and he went on to Post Graduate Internship which he completed gaining the respect again of his consultants and fellow interns.
As Pete went on to prepare for the board exams. In his review class, he met another doctor, Anna, and fell in love with her. Just as everything was going his way, Anna suddenly passed away due to a ruptured cerebral aneurysm just days before the board exam. In grief and depression (again) Pete decided to turn his back on the medical field completely and went into the Corporate industry.
After spending almost a decade in many jobs, some of which took him to other parts of the world, Pete emerged as a respected business leader working for one of the best companies in the world and was even featured in a Business Magazine for his innovation and excellent management skills. He spoke at international management conferences and gave advices which have saved many companies from bankruptcy during the Global Economic Crisis.
The virtues that he garnered from medical school were the same ones he used to propel his management career. Despite the luxurious life he was experiencing as a corporate executive, Pete still had the feeling that something was unfinished in his life. Against the advices of his peers in the Corporate industry, Pete made the difficult decision to take care of his unfinished business.
Pete had been out of the medical field for almost a decade so a lot of the material he reviewed no longer had any meaning to him. Being ill prepared for the board exam, Pete still took it and as expected he did not make it. Instead of wallowing in depression, Pete knew that he needed help in preparing for the most important examination of his life so he enrolled at a review course which revealed his gaps in medical knowledge.
Aside from regaining lost medical knowledge, Pete learned something else at this review course. He learned that his desire for success should be greater than his fear of failure. Although his classmates at this course were much younger than him and fresh out of medical school, Pete displayed extreme perseverance. While his classmates studied for two hours a day, Pete studied for four hours. He always went to extra mile to ensure that he was at par or even better than others around him.
Sure enough Pete passed the board exam with flying colors and instead of accepting a pending offer to lead another corporate team, Pete ventured into medical practice and eventually went on to teaching in various medical schools for the next five years of his life. He even went back to school to earn a Master's Degree.
Who would have thought that this medical school drop out would someday teach in medical school? Who would have imagined that a medical student who stumbled through four medical schools would himself become a department chairman at a medical school? Who would have envisioned that a person who failed the board exams would someday lecture future doctors before they take their board exams?
If you have not figured it out yet, Pete is actually ME and people who have heard me lecture in person find it difficult to believe that I am a product of a long string of failures. As I share my knowledge to my students, every one seems to have the impression that I was bred from excellence, when in fact I was molded through failure.
As I look back at my troublesome past, I can tell you these things:
1. Being a failure yesterday does not mean that you will be a failure today. We always have the power to change our situation no matter how dire or desperate it may be.
2. Failure is temporary no matter how often it comes to you. If I had dwelt on my failures and tragedies in life I would not be where I am today.
3. Failure only becomes permanent if you do nothing about it. So DON'T Quit!
4. I lost many battles but I did not lose the war. Losing battles and failing allows us to reassess our situation and discern where we went wrong. It gives us better perspective about the situation so we can approach it differently the next time.
5. Sometimes success takes longer for others to achieve. Even when I was an intern, my classmates from Medical school A were already finishing their specialty training. It's not a sprint. Success is a marathon. Some finish earlier than others. What's important is that you finish. Period!
6. Success has a right time and place. Sometimes we need to move around to somewhere more conducive for our quest for success. There are just places that will not nurture us to be successful and so it is not unthinkable to go somewhere else in search of lasting success.
7. Never believe other people's opinion of you. Some people are closed minded and only see what's on the surface but you know what's deep down inside. They will never have the privilege of seeing that wonderful side of you.
8. Failure should make you stronger and not tear you down. In most things in life, it's always about a test of character. The more you fail, the more resilient you should become.
9. Those who can avoid failure at all costs are gifted but there are some (like me) who learn things the hard way. There is nothing wrong with that. Life is not really unfair. It just revolves differently for every one. Never compare yourself to others!
10. Your desire for Success should be much greater than than your fear of failure. If you have fear, use it productively but don't let it be the reason for you to quit and run away.
11. There is no shortcut to success. If you want to be the best you have to sweat and bleed more than others. You have to go the extra mile in bettering yourself. While others sleep, you should still be studying. (Trust me, it works)
12. It does not matter if you fail. What matters is that you keep your integrity intact. One classmate of mine during an exam offered to show me her answers. I refused and she told me afterwards, "The reason why you are failing is that you have too much pride". Actually it's not pride but more of maintaining my integrity. I would rather fail than dishonor myself by cheating! Why is maintaining my integrity important? Because I handle the lives of other people and by having integrity it means you learned the important lessons that will help you save another person's life.
Honestly, I learned so much more from failure than I ever did from success.
If you are reading this now but are in the clear, meaning that you are moving on to the next step in medical school than I applaud you. Your hard work and diligence has paid off and you are moving up to greater challenges. If you have always maintained a culture of excellence from the start all the way until now, keep it up.
However, if you are in despair as you feel that despite your best efforts you are sinking further into quicksand, please know that it is not the end. Again, losing a battle now does not mean the war is lost. As I mentioned earlier, there is a time and place for success.
As with all great heroes, even in the most desperate situation, they gave it one last push and their all. Some heroes died but others lived on to fight another day. Be that person who lives to fight another day. Never give up on your dreams! Give it one last push!
I personally believe that being a doctor is a calling and if your dream is become one, no obstacle, challenge or situation, no matter how hopeless, should kill that dream. That dream only dies when you let it die.
For me it was all about heeding to my unfinished business and no matter how heartbreaking my failures were, I still pushed through and eventually made it. It also helps when you have parents who are patient and never give up on you because they know you are better than you think you are.
I also believe that everything happens for a reason. In my case, these things happened to me so that I can impart teachings to medical students that go beyond the classroom. Everyone of us needs inspiration and sometimes we draw that from the tragedies of the people who know and respect.
People may celebrate us for our achievements but they have no idea of the hardship we have to endure to reach it.
I know that for every student of mine who becomes a doctor, more lives can be saved. That has given my life the purpose it has been longing for. I may not become rich by doing this but money can never buy the satisfaction I feel for every student of mine who succeeds in life and career.
I wish you the best on the battles ahead and know that you will win your war.
Till next post - Doc France
